Being away wears on a person...

This is the thing. I love my job. Being in the travel industry and flying from one place to another is amazing. I've been places that I could never have imagined going when I was young. They seemed so very far away. Growing up on a farm in the Midwest really made the world seem like such a big place.

I remember one time in my early to mid-teens I was listening to news on the radio. They were talking about how a bus driver had gotten lost in New York City and basically had a breakdown. Finally a passenger had to take over the drivers seat and drive them the rest of the way into the city to their destination. The distance being something over 100 miles that the passenger had to drive. For me coming from small town America I could not fathom that concept. How could a city be so big? My town was roughly 3 miles square. It was about 11,000 people living there. I was able to understand the mathematics of it... but I couldn't conceive the idea of so much size all wrapped up in one city.

For example, have you ever tried the grasp the concept of outer space going on forever? You know that something has to, but... for lack of a better way of saying this... how is there enough space for anything to continue forever? It boggles the mind. That was the predicament that I was in when thinking about the sheer size of cities.

Now that I've been out on my own and have traveled many places around the world, I've learned that cities are amazing structures. The world is fascinating. Traveling the way that I do has made the mass of cities no longer seem so big. The world itself has shrunk from my ability to be in one place today, another tomorrow, and still another the next day. Friends have been made and maintained the world over... never knowing the next time I will see them... but knowing that its not going to be too long... nor a task when I do.




That being said... travel over the past number of years has really worn on me. I have loved it and hated it at the same time. Vacation for me is staying home. Tinkering around the house, enjoying the company of friends... in my community... and not worrying about packing a bag nor being on a time schedule.

I have tried changing my career and growing in new directions... but each time I have fallen back into my love... that of travel and getting away. When I say this I mean that working an office job day in and day out was not my cup of tea. I did it... for a number of years... but I ended up leaving that and coming back to travel. Although, I do have to say... traveling full time for a living is tough:. friendships at home suffer, relationships have a tough time developing and being maintained, being able to commit to a gathering or party is rare, even simple things such as caring for plants and having pets also become quite difficult.

Finding that balance between being home and getting away is what needs to be done. This means that I need to find a second job... start a business... save lots of money that I can earn interest off of (but how?)... anything. Something that I can do to earn enough to be home more often... but also continue my work travels so that I don't feel stuck. Let me tell you... when the options of travel are lost the world again grows to be a very big place... actually huge... even enormous. Things, places, and people become so far from you... and reality sets in.



My agenda is to begin the search for improving my life. Being home much more... but still not all the time. If you don't like a situation you have to do something about it.